Get Crazy With the Cheese Whiz

I'm not going to lie.

I'm just writing this for an excuse to use the title.

Sometimes, around 10 PM usually, after a really long day, I'll get random bursts of energy and end up dancing like a maniac in front of my bathroom mirror to a myriad of songs for about 25 whole minutes.

I'm just now coming off of one of those crazy highs.  Listening to Beck- Loser, and thinking, "Get crazy with the cheese whiz must be one of the greatest lyrics of all time."

That, or my other personal favorite line from the song, "Yeah, sprechen sie Deutches, bay-bee!"

Hi.

It's been awhile, I'm sorry, I'm bad at blogging.  You all knew this already. It's also Spring Break.  I've been home for two weeks now, and life has been insanely busy, as it tends to be once you find yourself returning to the place of your birth.

I'm going back to CB in four days.

My world is all sort of topsy-turvy right now, and I don't really know what to do with it.

There's just a lot.  Not a little of a lot, but a lot of a lot, and a lot more coming.  Yes.  I realize that makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.  I told you. Topsy-freaking-turvy, man.

I think 93.754 % of it is just me being really inconceivably tired.

The other however-many-remaining-integers percentage is just growing up.

It's all fine and dandy, I mean, there's not anything stupendously unfortunate going on, but I (being the confrontational equivalent of a box turtle that I am) have had a hard time trying to adjust to life and it's fast-moving pace.

It's like suddenly everything hits you.  All. At. Once.

BOOM.

Life.

Thaaaar she blows, Cap'n!

Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of rum.

Except not.

Because I go to Bible School.  That would be, like, so against the rules.

Anyways.  I digress.

Mostly, like I said, I'm just tired, and I'm afraid, and there's a whole new world waiting for me this year; I've gotten so many glimpses of it from so many different angles over the past two weeks, and it's all very exciting and terrifying and nerve-wracking and heartbreaking and death-defying and positively impossible to ignore.

Which is something that I desperately want to do.  Also, I want to run as fast as possible in the opposite direction as I can. So fast, in fact, I'd like to sprint backwards all the way to the age of 6, when I was lying awake in my bed, and my biggest problem in the world was how I was afraid of R.O.U.S. and literally fell asleep dreaming about The Princess Bride every night.  Curses upon me and my godforsaken bubble of comfort.

But I can't do that, now, can I?

Onwards and upwards, friends.

Defying gravity, remember?

This is my life, now.  "This is the business that we're in," to quote The Godfather (as always) and I'm just trying to figure it all out while I still have time.

It's not bad, it's not wrong, it's just life.  It's just where I am right now.

It's all part of the process.

On a sidenote, I think things will really look much better after I see The Titanic on the big screen in 3D in a few weeks.

No, I'm not exaggerating, I honestly believe that will magically make my life less confusing.

It's amazing what a little Leonardo DiCaprio can do for a weary mind.

Especially this weary mind.

Speaking of weary, I need a hot shower and a skype date with The Best Friend, whom I get to see in 8 short days, and whom I'm extremely excited to hug, and dance lighthearted with on the beach, and whom will not-so-gently remind me that I just need to get out of my head, sometimes, for the skies to turn blue again and for everything to go back to normal.

Love you, Beck.

Love you, all.

Wishing you all the double stuffed oreos and crunchy peanut butter in the world,

Hannah